How Working Mom Confidence is Built When You Do What You Say
What if taking care of you is actually the best thing you can do for your family?
Here’s How.
Lesley Logan shared something so many working moms need to hear: prioritizing your health isn't a luxury, it's a ripple effect. When you feel good, you have more love and energy to give your kids, and you're modeling something powerful, showing them that caring for yourself matters. Lesley talked about the mindset shift required to get there, encouraging moms to visualize the woman they want to become and start acting like her now, even in small ways. Simple affirmations, like reminding yourself "I am a woman who prioritizes her health," can quietly rewire the self-talk that's been holding you back.
She also introduced the idea of "movement snacks," small bursts of activity you can slip into even the busiest day. Five minutes of stretching, a short walk, or a quick dance party with your kids counts. The goal isn't perfection, it's consistency. Lesley reminded listeners that a sustainable routine doesn't require hours of free time, just a willingness to show up in small, flexible ways. If you miss a workout, you simply adjust and try again later, no guilt required. That flexibility is what makes self-care realistic for moms juggling a hundred things at once.
HERE ARE THE 3 KEY TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE:
1️⃣ Self-care benefits your whole family.
2️⃣ Visualize your future self to shift your mindset.
3️⃣ Small movement breaks beat all-or-nothing routines.
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“Action is the antidote to fear. It is also what brings clarity.”
Guest Appearing in this Episode
About Lesley Logan
Lesley Logan is a Pilates instructor, speaker, and mindset coach who has spent years helping women build strength, consistency, and confidence, both in their bodies and in their daily lives. Known for her practical, no-pressure approach to health, she focuses on helping busy women create sustainable habits that fit into real life rather than perfect, idealized routines. Her work centers on the idea that small, consistent actions, paired with the right mindset, can lead to lasting transformation for women balancing careers, families, and their own well-being.
Full Transcript
Tia Graham (00:02.86)
Hi Leslie, great to have you here today.
Lesley Logan (00:05.677)
my god, Tia, this is gonna be a lot of fun. I miss your face. I miss your gorgeous smile.
Tia Graham (00:09.55)
Aw, thank you. Well, I'm I'm so excited to talk with you. And you have a lot of exciting things going on, which I've been seeing like bits and pieces of. But let's just get started. So the first question I have is: this podcast and this show is for really busy, overwhelmed, stressed-out, crazy busy working moms who have little ones at home.
Plus, they're growing their careers, whether they're an entrepreneur or they're working in a company. And I know that you have a very full plate at all times, too. And so the first question I have is: how do you make sure that no matter what is going on, you prioritize movement, you prioritize your well-being, you prioritize what's good for you.
as you are running this super big business. How do you make sure that in your calendar there's time for what makes you feel good?
Lesley Logan (01:16.466)
I love this question. And I I'm I aside from the mom part, I feel every part of the listener who is listening to this. Like I feel lots of dreams, lots of ambitions, lots of capabilities, the person who everyone gives everything to because you'll just get it done. Like I feel the stress and the desire and all of that. and I will just say, like, while I don't have children, I do believe what I say will help you in a way that like
hopefully makes me be maybe makes you think of things in a little bit different light. my my parents did not prioritize themselves first. And because of that, I I am seeing how that's affected their life today. My mom is very young for a mom of I'm 43 and she's only in her early 60s. So and she has health issues. Yeah, young. Health issues that knowing what I know now in the health and fitness world, a lot of those could have been prevented with just
Tia Graham (02:03.009)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lesley Logan (02:12.755)
making sure that she did simple movement practices to keep muscles and joints strong. And it didn't help their marriage by not prioritizing themselves first. and it didn't so I will just say like I have a friend who is a mother of five and she says she has said to me, actions are caught, not taught. And I really do believe that and so most of the women that I work with and help, they they have children. They're very busy too. So I I understand this and I will say you have to
I don't know that you're teaching your children much if you teach them that the your world revolves around them. I think that they do need to see that you that there is a time in their life where they are a priority of themselves. I think that's important. Now, if they are, if they are any kind of special needs, if they're infants, if they cannot feed themselves, is a whole different story. But I will say there are different stages in being a mom, of course. And so you do what you can do, and you keep in mind that.
You want to be the mom and hopefully the grandmother to their children who can keep up with the life that they have. And the only way you can do that is if you actually put yourself first. And that does not mean hours at the gym. In fact, I'm really saddened by this change in in how fitness is being shown. That there's like Pilates girl is doing two classes a day and all this stuff. You should not be able to do clu two classes applies ever in a row. I cannot. So I really want to say like.
You start with you can do. If it's five minutes, you do five minutes and you protect those five minutes. And then that five minutes becomes ten minutes. And if you're telling me, it's not worth it, because I know my recovering perfectionists and overachievers, you're like five minutes is a waste of it's not enough. It is actually something. And if you are doing that for yourself, it becomes 10 and 20. And it becomes an easier thing to protect because you start to realize how much you feel better. And it does mean asking for help. And it does mean delegating something off. And it does mean maybe bringing
Tia Graham (03:56.738)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (04:07.297)
the kids along to do whatever you're doing. And it does mean maybe you love going to a class, but you're gonna do it at home. Look, it's you do what you can do, but you will, I promise you, the life you want to have with your children where you're keeping up and having a lot of fun, you have these great memories, it comes from prioritizing you first because you being tired, exhausted, and unfortunately deconditioned does not allow for you to have that generous love and energy you want to have with that.
Tia Graham (04:33.3)
Yes, yes, and yes. And I really appreciate that you connected to your future self. You know, I I move consistently so that I stay sane, right? And that so I feel well and that I have the energy and you know a more positive optimistic mindset. And I do one of my children is special needs.
And so, yes, it definitely takes way more time. but I I know that I'm a better mom now, I'm a better wife, human, and it's like good for me now. But I think what you said about the future self, right? I think with kids and work, everything feels so all-consuming now. And the listener is super time poor.
you know, extremely time poor, but really connecting to who do you want to be in your 60s, in your 70s, in your 80s. And you know, it's kind of like it's kind of like investing for retirement. It's like the same thing. It's like boring, not fun, takes time. This isn't like the sexy stuff, but it's so, so important. And yeah, I think
Lesley Logan (05:44.545)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (05:59.627)
I think we're we don't connect to our older selves enough, like you were saying.
Lesley Logan (06:03.561)
We we I I I think it's 'cause honestly, I'm sure it's exhausting and no one wants to think about that part of their life anyways. It's so far down the road. But I'm sure you have listeners who are in that sandwich generation of having young kids and having old girl parents who are getting older and like you are time poor, but the but the actual thing about energy is you don't get energy, you have it.
Tia Graham (06:15.757)
Yes.
Lesley Logan (06:25.419)
And you have it like the way like energy gets energy and like when you move your body, it cr increases blood flow, right? It brings dopamine to the brain. Every your brain is an addict for that, right? So it brings all of this up to you and it makes everything you have to do easier. I am talking to you as a woman with Audi H D. I have got to keep my up my dopamine as much as possible my brain in perimenopause. So I just want you to know, like, I feel you, I see you, there's so much and not
Do I want you to also know I do not wake up going, thank God it's my morning routine. I can't even wait to do it. I often wake up going, here we go. You know. But here's the thing: when you get moving, when you start to move your body, it is easier to move your body. And so what I will also say is you don't need motivation. It's actually not true. Motivation is the thing that you is needed when you want to do something that is hard and tough.
Tia Graham (07:03.394)
Yes.
Lesley Logan (07:19.147)
So to get started, motivation is really good. Motivation is like the starter in your car, like or it's like turns it on, but then you don't need it anymore, right? You're good. So if you are waiting for motivation, it's not something that will happen daily. So use it to get going. But then what what has to come into place is just simple routine habits. And so one of the greatest things that I ever did for myself is just like I and being a police instructor for as many years as I have, and so many people saying, I will have this goal, but then
And then investing in the goal with money, but then not the time and not following up with it. I was like, why do people do this? Why do people buy things and spend money on things and sign up for things and then quit? Like what is going on? Right. And also high achieving women. Like this is not like, you know, so I was like, what is what is the thing? And so what we're what what I discovered in studying how habits are truly created is that we tend to get all or nothing in our mindset about how things are supposed to look or be. So if we don't have
Tia Graham (07:56.258)
not follow through, right.
Tia Graham (08:02.018)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (08:15.297)
Like if we are 10 minutes late to something, well, we might as well not do it because now we only have 20 minutes to do it. And it's like actually, if you can do what is possible always when it comes to your movement practice, and you can make that the habit and you can pair it with something that's easy, right? Not like, a bell goes off, but just like, I'm I'm already on the ground doing this thing. So I'm also gonna every time I do this thing on the ground, I'm gonna I'm gonna do five push-ups or I'm gonna do I'm gonna hold a plank or whatever. If you can do that, what happens is
Your brain starts to seek out these opportunities, these little movement snacks, and it becomes easier to do. And then because you start to feel better, it becomes easier to do it more often. And the time that you can dedicate to it comes to it. But when you are waiting for that motivation, you will go, I'm not motivated today, and there's this other thing I have to do. No, I get up and I do my walk every morning, I do my applies every morning because when I'm done, I'm so glad I did it.
And then there are some days I'm motivated to do more, but most of the time it's like, well, my habits and routines have made this space and I'm gonna go do that. And I know I'll feel better when it's over. And I share that because I think so many people look at a someone else's grass and go, look how green it is. They love what they're doing. No, I see my neighbor run it every day and sometimes he has a smile on his face and sometimes he doesn't, you know, but it's his routine. And so, you know, we just gotta find a way to put these things into this busy schedule, but put them in minutes and moments that you can, not like, I have to wait for to have an hour. Like you're not that's not gonna happen. We know that.
Tia Graham (09:36.879)
Right, right. Super important. I love the name movement snacks. so if someone listening right now doesn't have the consistent motivation, right, like you said, which is super normal, doesn't have the healthy habits, doesn't have a morning routine, and for a lot of people.
Lesley Logan (09:54.103)
Mm-hmm.
Tia Graham (10:04.172)
The morning routine is you are with your kids. Like, you know, you are making lunches. It's summer now. They might be going to summer camp. They might, all these things. can we talk about the mindset, the beliefs? Can we talk about some foundational pieces that you know that that you need to have and that you know, working moms need to have so that they can.
Lesley Logan (10:21.505)
Mm-hmm.
Lesley Logan (10:28.077)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (10:33.832)
Start building in the little movement breaks from the day. And maybe sometimes, like you know, I do a lot of like 25-minute workouts. I never do an hour. I used to pre-kids, but like for me, it's 25 minutes, not every day. but talk about the beliefs and the mindset and and the thinking that someone who's really, really busy needs to have.
Lesley Logan (10:38.285)
Mm-hmm.
Lesley Logan (10:55.286)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (10:58.838)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (11:00.096)
And you know, maybe maybe like I want people to maybe change their thinking a little bit because I know that this is this is what you teach and you, you know, your show really talks about the, you know, vacuum. So
Lesley Logan (11:04.479)
Yeah. I love this.
Lesley Logan (11:09.265)
yeah, you gotta be until you you gotta be until you see it. So you have to you have to think about the woman that you wished was already happening. Okay, if I was a woman who made time for myself and I had time and I I worked out every day, like what how do I make different decisions? Right. So you if you you act you act from the finish line, the goal, right? And that might not mean you
it does happens tomorrow, right? Like so if the goal is I am a woman who spends thirty minutes a day for myself, five minutes meditating, twenty minutes moving, five minutes reading some sort of I have a beautiful book I read every morning, that has like a daily motivational thing, right? That is, by the way, just so you know, thirty minutes is two percent of your day. So a mindset shift you need to have is that you are a woman who deserves to prioritize yourself for two percent of your day.
two percent of your day. Now, if we cannot get thirty minutes at one pit, that's okay. We could do ten, ten, and ten, right? Like figure it we can figure this out. And another thing in your mind is like I'm a woman who can figure this out. Like talking
positively about yourself in your brain. And if you need to put post-its everywhere, what your kids are gonna see wonderful motivation affirmations. I think that's great. We are a family who Yeah, the modeling. We are people who'd move our bodies. We are people who go speak kindly to ourselves. Put those things everywhere. So I feel for you parents, my God, I do not know how any parent actually has a job or a life. I'm gonna be honest, I live in Nevada and I think the kids are never in school. My dad is a crossing guard, 74 years old, and I'm like, do you have work today? He's like, no, they're not in today. I'm like
Tia Graham (12:19.212)
Right, the modelling.
Lesley Logan (12:40.001)
They're never in five days a week. You never work five. I don't know how anyone does it. So, two things I would say is so there's a mindset of like the be it till you see it. Who if I was this woman who already did this, how would I respond to this email request to volunteer yet again in my kids' classroom? my loves, I bet you there's another mom who needs to do it. You do not need to worry about that. No, be be the last, be the be the la you need someone? yeah, be the last.
Tia Graham (12:59.756)
Yeah, I don't volunteer for all the things, no.
Lesley Logan (13:08.715)
Ditch effort. Don't be the first one to raise your hand in this stuff because
Tia Graham (13:11.372)
Right. Because some of the and some of those women are not working also in a company or they don't have their own company, right? So that's that's a different journey.
Lesley Logan (13:17.345)
Yeah, there are some people who that that correct. There are people who need that of I volunteered a place and I want to be the volunteers there all the time. I don't have the time. So they take me when they can get me and they love that. So that is you can be that woman, especially right now when you're trying to figure out how to implement prioritizing yourself first. So the mindset shifts are being that. And I also wanted to say mindset shifting is actually one of the hardest habits to reframe in your brain. So if you are someone who
negatively has self-talk, like I said I was gonna do this and I didn't do it yet again. I will just say as as many as much as people say it's easy for you, just like repeat something else that's positive. It's actually hard for the brain because it's wired in that way and it's a harder habit to catch that you're doing. So I just want to give you permission that is advanced habit technique to rechange what you're saying about yourself in your head. But if you're catching yourself, then you just have a mantra that's like I'm a woman who prior.
prioritize herself first. I'm I'm a worthy of 2% of my day, right? Find a sentence. The other thing that I teach, and this is for every busy woman, but especially for my mom's listening. So your calendar is like a mason jar, all right? And we all know a mason jar has a lid. All right. So if everything that you need to get done in a week has to fit in the mason jar.
And if it doesn't fit, it's going the lid won't go on. So what I tend to see is people are trying to put too many things in and they're trying to fit themselves in afterwards. So I want you to take, and you're gonna have probably at least two schedules. You're probably gonna have an in-school schedule and an out-of-school schedule. You might even have three. There's the winter out-of-school schedule versus a summer out-of-school schedule. So there's different ones. But you're gonna take this piece of paper, you're gonna make seven columns. That's your week. I like to start my week on a Monday.
some people like a Sunday, whatever you want. Then you're gonna have your days of your week. And the first time hour in the of the day that's gonna go on the left side is the time you wanna wake up each day. And then the last time is a time you wanna go to bed. The first thing that goes in your mason jar is when do you sleep? Because my loves, sleep is the most important thing. And I understand if you're in perimenopause, it's the hardest thing.
Lesley Logan (15:26.655)
If you don't have sleep down, that is your number one task to do today. Advocate for yourself. Find sleep supplements. I am on three different ones to help me get six and a half hours because seven just seems to be elusive. So I understand. Then the next thing we have to think about that goes in the calendar. And I know you'll be like, Why have this whole calendar? Don't think about the calendar you have today. Have the dream calendar in mind because then we can work with that. We can work to build towards it. So I
What goes in the mason jar are are your calendar thing needs fit in three piles: rocks, gemstones, glitter. Your rocks are big things. They're harder to move, right? These are work schedules, these are kid drop-offs, things like that. also rocks, time with your partner, individual time with your kids. But the most important rock, before any of that goes in, is gonna also be your movement practice.
When it what is your dream movement practice? What is your dream meditation, prioritization of self practice? You're gonna put those in, right? Then you're gonna put in the other family need stuff, those rocks and your work stuff. Once those rocks and boulders are in, then we can look at, and this is where people mistake they do not put these in second, it's your gemstones. It's the things that propel your life forward. These are gonna be the hobbies for my people who work for themselves. These are the things that,
Tia Graham (16:33.998)
Mm-hmm.
Lesley Logan (16:51.401)
actually help they're the they're the projects that are probably not making the money today, but they're propelling the business forward. This is your life coaching step. This is like where you are chain you're becoming a bigger person. So Gemstone's
Tia Graham (17:04.194)
Right. That personal and and or professional development.
Lesley Logan (17:07.073)
Correct. And they'll change all the time. So my gemstone time, you know, it's it's actually little random spots throughout the day. And like what goes in that changes based on the week or what launch I have or what hobby I'm now interested in as an ADHD person, it changes all the time. So that's gemstone time, right? It goes in next. And then the last pile, you don't even have to schedule it, it just happens. It's glitter, right? Glitter can fit in everywhere. So if we think of our mason jar, we put our rocks in first, we put in our gemstones. The gemstones will just like
Fill in some spaces. And then the glitter will just take up the rest of the space. Glitter is responding to emails, responding to text messages, resp these phone calls. To me, glitter is anything you can do. And this is gonna sound terrible, but sitting on a toilet or staying in line for coffee. If you can do it, like that means paying bills, things like that. So if you if you think of your things that go into your calendar in those three categories, and then you put your dream schedule together, now what we can do is take your dream schedule and overlap it with the schedule of today.
I mean go, okay, so what has to move for this to happen? And what can move? So first you're gonna go, whoa, I am actually prioritizing glitter. I have a scheduled email time. No, this in this day and age, if something's truly an emergency, the person who emailed you will also then call and text you. Like they will get a hold of you, it will happen. But you don't have like some of that time doesn't have to be scheduled. Anything that propels your business forward in your email, that could be scheduled. But I think you'll realize there's things that you could actually shift around.
You know, and then depending on how old your kids get, we forget they're getting older, so the responsibilities can change if they can if they can handle that, right? So I
Tia Graham (18:36.258)
Yeah, they as they get more independent and they can do more things on their own.
Lesley Logan (18:40.065)
Well, especially as they want it, right? So I was teaching this schedule thing in the UK and this woman goes, I see your morning walk and I just wanna do that every day. I wish I had time for myself, but I have to get my kids to school. And I said, how old are your children? And she said, Well, they're eleven and and fourteen. And I said, if do they have special needs or is this like they're they all they're, you know, taking care of themselves, they can fill their backpack, all that stuff. She's like, yeah. And I said, Do they want to go to the movies by themselves?
Tia Graham (18:41.966)
Right.
Lesley Logan (19:07.489)
Go on a date with someone. They have like desire to play with their friends without you there. She's like, Yeah, I'm like, I just don't think they can do that if they can't make their own lunch. I was like, I I know that sounds harsh. Maybe the 11-year-old needs help, but like, how can we? So I said, what if we take time tonight to say, hey guys, I want to go for a walk every morning while you get ready for school. So what do we have to do tonight so that you're set up? How what do I need to do? I need to help you make a sandwich? What do you need to do? Just try it out. Just ask them.
Tia Graham (19:19.928)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (19:37.24)
Guess what? The next day they did their own breakfast. Was it perfect? No. Did it was a little messier in the kitchen? Probably yes. And she got a morning walk-in. And so it's just, it's not going to be perfect, but like I do think that we for as busy, capable, we can do anything and everything. We forget that delegation can happen in certain areas and at certain times. And so I just would be like and I feel like Leslie and my kids think, Of course not. You're going to make the sandwich for them. But like
Tia Graham (19:45.59)
You got to go for a walk. Yeah.
Tia Graham (19:58.616)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (20:03.296)
Right. But but I'll share with you because I had someone, same thing, and I don't go for a walk every morning, but I do go for walks and you know do other exercise. I had a mom message me, how do you go for a walk? Same thing. How do you go for a walk be in the morning before your kids go to school? My kids are nine and eleven. My 11 year old is special needs. And I wrote back very honestly, because my husband's home. I said, I give them some screens sometimes. And like that's you know.
Is that perfection? Would some people judge? Which I literally don't care because it's like what works for me and what works for them. And you know, my daughter uses screens, like it helps her regulate to be able do a lot of other stuff. So the the 30 minutes, like you're saying, it's like you can always come up with with different reasons on why not. But what you're saying is, and I agree with you, is it is a rock. And
Lesley Logan (20:38.293)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (20:43.948)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (20:58.862)
plan for it. And I think so many working moms plan for kids and plan for work. And that's in the calendar. And their self, it's like the glitter or the sand, right? It's like, maybe when I think about it and it's yeah, it's it's like the wrong way to think about it.
Lesley Logan (21:05.068)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (21:13.377)
Yeah. Yeah. They're they're they've put themselves at the glitter and they're you are the most important rock. I mean, like you I listened to somebody else who was like who said, you know, people are gonna say this is terrible, but like, my marriage comes before my children. You know, and I think
Tia Graham (21:19.105)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (21:32.534)
And your marriage, your marriage is the number one relationship example for your kids, right? It's gonna affect theirs. So and and I wanna know, I mean, everything we're saying, it's not, it's not easy. You're, you know, of course, like work, you there's so much more you could always be doing for work and your kids have lots. And so, yeah, yeah, yeah, what we're saying is important.
Lesley Logan (21:37.335)
Yes.
Yes.
Lesley Logan (21:55.608)
I would say Tia, I'm sure, I'm sure you neither one of us get our to-do list done every day. Ever.
Tia Graham (22:00.98)
No, god, no. And there's always stuff added to the to-do list. And yes, there's always more. And I've heard many people say this like work will always fill every second. There's always more. Yeah.
Lesley Logan (22:06.039)
Yes, I
Lesley Logan (22:12.437)
Yes. Yes. And you know it's like like I mean, I'm sitting in this podcast room that I love and my husband and I have had so much extra work going on that we created, but like it th the the snowball picked up a little faster. So this is our Monica closet right now. If you wanna remember friends, like it's just like everything just goes in there and you can't see it on the screen and that's where it's at because
It will get done when it needs to, but what I cannot sacrifice is the things that make me feel so good in my body that I can be part of my marriage and I can be there for the people who like you if we're really honest with ourselves, if we do not prioritize ourselves, our sleep, our movement practice, the things that make us feel whole, we do not respond to our names or mom or any of those things as sincerely and generously and loving as we want to. You don't. You eventually are just Yes. Yes.
Tia Graham (22:59.436)
Yeah, no, you're more negative, more reactive. Yes, yes. I wanna ask you about confidence. And you didn't put this, you didn't put this as a specific question, but the there's some I wanted to ask you about this because since I've met you and since I've known you and everything you're doing, and even I know about your career like before that you were doing this, and
Lesley Logan (23:09.995)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (23:28.13)
I believe and you could tell me if I'm wrong, but I believe that you are quite a confident person. Is that right?
Lesley Logan (23:35.693)
I exude a lot of confidence and inside I'm a little bit scared most of the time.
Tia Graham (23:41.227)
Okay, okay, great. So that's okay. So like most people, like yeah, so you exude a lot of confidence and you're scared and you have fear and you're maybe unsure, insecure about things, but you are presenting and it doesn't seem like it's like this inauthentic. It's that yeah, you're scared and you're doing it anyway. So
Lesley Logan (23:44.737)
I'm just
Lesley Logan (24:06.337)
Yeah. Yeah. I think that's I don't know. I I thought that's how a lot of people do it. but
Tia Graham (24:11.402)
So, okay, so can we talk, can you talk about how you do that? And I want you to think about in cr in career, right? Because the person listening of exuding that confidence or or d walking the walk, right? As an entrepreneur or in a corporation, in an organization. And also I want and I know you don't have kids, but I believe that you can talk about it in this way too, is
Lesley Logan (24:18.017)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (24:29.611)
Mm-hmm.
Tia Graham (24:42.208)
You, you know, moms have never been moms before, and you're constantly faced with new challenges, curveballs, you know, kids giving negative feedback, or you know, there's all these things, and yet you don't want to be living in this place of like where you're constantly like, shit, am I a good mom? Am I doing this right? And so if you could talk about those two and and kind of how you do it and advice, because I think this would be really helpful for the listener.
Lesley Logan (25:03.623)
yeah.
Lesley Logan (25:08.789)
Yeah. Yeah. I helps I think I think it can because I can kind of lean into, you know, the industry that I'm in. you know, it's quite popular the Plies industry right now, but people don't realize that like twenty years ago it was n it was popular amongst people who knew what it was. but it was a very much a hierarchy. So for example, I'm a second generation Pilies instructor, and that does not mean my mother was. It means my teacher learned from Joe Pilates. So it's like this weird
Tia Graham (25:26.061)
Yeah.
Tia Graham (25:37.134)
Got it.
Lesley Logan (25:37.39)
Weird lineage thing. And so, and so how who trained you mattered, right? And so when I would go into a space, it's like, well, you were trained by so and so, who was trained by so so, but it's watered down. So I'm gonna go like I don't have anything to learn from you. I'm gonna go over here. And so I had to learn how to be like confident without other people telling me I'm doing a good job because other people were judging my job based on.
Things that are outside my control. And so I think as pa I'm I'm sure parents, I don't even know how you all do it with this and social media stuff right now. And there's so many people telling you what's a good parent and what's not a good parent. But what I will tell you that I did to make sure I understood how I could be confident in the what I was doing. Did my clients feel seen? Did they feel loved? Did they feel heard? Did they feel helped? And I feel like you can translate to your children. Do they feel seen? Do they feel loved?
Tia Graham (26:32.142)
Children and work. Yeah, say it again. Seen, loved, heard.
Lesley Logan (26:34.855)
seen, la seen, loved, heard, and helped. Right? Like
Tia Graham (26:39.522)
Yeah. And this is whether you're a leader at work, whether you like you said you're an entrepreneur and you have clients. And then as a parent of and what you're saying is turn the don't think about yourself.
Lesley Logan (26:42.251)
Yes.
Lesley Logan (26:46.784)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (26:52.213)
Yeah, I you can't I think you'll get two in your head. I have to I had to stop waiting for me, the firstborn parentified daughter, to give me credit for what I was doing. Yeah, I had to, I had to what she she is not gonna give me the the loving praise because that's not really what was taught to me. So what I had to do was
Tia Graham (27:03.17)
We got that in common. We have that in common.
Lesley Logan (27:19.495)
Noticed the response of the people that I was paying attention to that were coming to me and were my clients and the people that I worked with. I ran jewelry stores and I ran Pilates studios later on. And it's like, do these teachers feel uplifted? Do they not doesn't mean that they're gaslit? Doesn't mean I'm not a tough love person. Doesn't mean they weren't sat down and told, Hey, here's where I see you're doing amazing things and here's where we need to work on some support. But in
in a way that makes people feel like there is options and possibilities, right? Like it doesn't mean I wouldn't write people up, but also like let's come with a game plan that you can succeed. What do you want to do? You said you want to do this, it's not working out. How how can we make a new plan? Right. So I think if you're waiting for outside validation of whether or not you're doing a good job, you might get it. Like I am very lucky where I'm at my career today. I get lots of affirmation. And that stuff could actually derail
the track that I'm on. There you can't listen to all of it. You'll just be like in a big head and also maybe end up creating something you don't want. Like I have people who are like, you should do this and you should do that. And it's like if I only listen to the outside affirmations, I might be on the the wrong track. So we gotta we gotta figure out how do we listen. So for the moms and the bosses, it's like how do you listen to the people who you are supporting and guiding and leading and do they feel seen, do they feel heard, do they feel loved and do they feel helped? And
Tia Graham (28:37.646)
Mm-hmm.
Lesley Logan (28:44.095)
And and then the other thing is like if you feel like you're lacking confidence in something, I think it's important to just to get data. I my my husband has been very helpful in my life as a sounding board on these things. But like I've told this story before, but one of the first times I had to teach a really massive class is many years ago when I was invited to teach this class and in the front row were all these people who traveled in to be at this inaugural event.
Tia Graham (29:00.118)
Mm.
Lesley Logan (29:12.737)
They'd never done Pilai's before. And I'm like, wow, okay. So I have to teach brand new people in a group class. The second row were a bunch of people in my industry. They weren't there for nefarious reasons. They were for there for support, but they don't teach like I do. We like our literally opposite ends of the spectrum of what the idea of Pilies is. And I'm like, okay, and I have these people who have a different lens of what of expectations. And I had 50 other people who were just there. Were they there because I was the only class I had room? I don't know. Were they there because they liked me? And I said to him, I said, is the mic on? And he goes, No. And I said,
I don't I don't know if I can do this. I'm a little nervous. And he goes, What is you're just gonna do what you always do. Right? You're just gonna be always doing it. So, like I'll just say, if you have a little shake in you, often it means that you care. You're probably not a narcissist. you want people to get a good experience. That is huge. And so, yes. You care. It means you care. So
Tia Graham (29:56.312)
So
Tia Graham (30:00.055)
Yeah. And you and you want to be a good mom. And yeah, it's like you, yeah, you care. I love what he just said though, and I want to repeat it. It's like when you have when you feel uncertain, whether it's in your career or you feel unsure or a little shaky, a little nervous, a little anxious, or you're not sure if you are, you know, doing the right thing as a mom, right? In the both of these big areas of your life, is
reconnecting of like, yeah, do what you've always done. Like you are good. You are enough. You are like kind of just get out of your head and take action.
Lesley Logan (30:39.543)
Yes. And here's what I'm also saying: action is the antidote to fear. It is also what brings clarity. And then the thing, because you mentioned confidence, I think is I wanted to say where confidence actually comes from, what they know confidence comes from, is not waiting until you feel ready. It is actually, if you do things that you said you will do, you will have confidence in yourself. So if you yes.
Tia Graham (31:02.594)
basically following through and being accountable to yourself.
Lesley Logan (31:05.867)
Yes, which is why it's so important you cannot be an all or nothing mindset when it comes to these changes and the movement practice and prioritization of self you wanna do. It means, today I was like, I'm running a little late. Should I go volunteer? Like I told them I told them I would next week, but maybe I'll just do it tomorrow. And I like, No, I'm a person who does what they said they're gonna do. So I'm gonna go. And
Because I did that, when stuff happens, when things outside your control or you're put on a stage that's bigger than you've experienced, when when a thing happens with your kid that's just outside of the experience you have had so far, because you have you have the record, the history of being able to figure it out, you will have the confidence to figure it out. And I think that that is something I can lean on.
Tia Graham (31:51.64)
Mm-hmm.
Lesley Logan (31:56.012)
this many years into my career, when I do something new, I'm not I no longer wait for the outside validation. I like wait for my inner validation. I test it amongst people I n I whose opinions of me matter. And then I do the thing. And if I get the extra credit from the other people, that's a bonus. but I
Tia Graham (32:15.086)
Right. But you're not doing it because of that or yes. Yes.
Lesley Logan (32:19.325)
you can't because you guys, they just keep changing where the bar is. They keep changing what is a good mom, what's a great boss? Great bosses, you see people who use the disc method. And now great bosses are people who do this other thing over here. Like great moms were like it changes so much. And so I think like really getting honest with who I who you want to be. I mean, that's the podcast I'll have you on. Like who do you want to be? And then acting like that person just a little bit every day, filtering it through decisions. And then also you're gonna make mistakes. I make them all the time.
Tia Graham (32:23.106)
Right. And there's always people doing yeah, doing different things.
Tia Graham (32:49.108)
yeah, constantly. That's if you're not making mistakes, you're not, yeah, you're not you must not be doing anything because yeah, being alive, whether it's work, marriage, career, all you know, parenting, et cetera, like so I love it in that you you connect to who you're helping, whether it's you know, kids, clients, people on your team about seeing loved.
Lesley Logan (32:56.162)
Yeah.
Lesley Logan (33:09.218)
Mm-hmm.
Tia Graham (33:14.894)
Heard helped, and you also said uplifted. And I also wrote down like coach. And it kind of goes back to that jar, that jar analogy, too, that you are planning for how you want to live, how you want to feel, what you want to do. And then you are following through with yourself. And as you are doing that, you're gonna have challenges, you're gonna, you know, learn new things.
Lesley Logan (33:17.357)
What's it?
Tia Graham (33:43.587)
And you're gonna figure things out. And so then when you're faced with a new thing that's making you not feel confident, is reminding I'm thinking good old Marie Forle, right? Of like everything is figure outable, of just that reminder. I love it all. So what in addition to everything you said, what is another tip or action?
Lesley Logan (33:52.619)
Yeah, it is.
Tia Graham (34:10.624)
that helps you feel good since is the Feel Good Club podcast that helps you feel good that you think could help the listeners feel good too. One other thing that helps you.
Lesley Logan (34:22.077)
my gosh. So I will say if you are a morning person, make sure you see the sunrise. And if you are an evening person, look for the moon. I know those things sound a little woog based if we're like everything's been so strategic, but those are two things I do every day because I wake up early. I do wake up like this morning I was locking the door to the house and I was like, it's pink on my wall and I looked and the pink orange sun was coming just up above I live in Vegas. So it's just coming up.
Of the strip out of the skyline. I was like, wow, look at that. And then, you know, I love looking at the how the sky changes or the colors depending on the year. Like if that's what I do every morning because it does take you out of your brain stuff that is gonna just if you Yeah, if you are like me, you wake up and as soon as your brain realizes what day it is, you're like, I got this to do this to do like my brain, but like it just that like it paw it hits pause for me.
Tia Graham (35:04.406)
Yes. It's the emotion of awe.
Lesley Logan (35:17.085)
and then I always look at the moon because the moon it changes in the sky, it changes shape, it sometimes it looks like a smile, sometimes it looks like a thumbnail, sometimes it's this big, bright thing. and so either of those two things I think can really help. And if you are a busy parent, I don't see what could be wrong about your kids seeing either of those things each day. and so that they could do it with you. but those are just easy, easier things. And if you're like, I live somewhere where that's impossible, then find something.
Tia Graham (35:31.0)
Mm-hmm.
Tia Graham (35:37.39)
Mm-hmm.
Lesley Logan (35:46.231)
to be in awe about outside. Get outside though. It it just yes.
Tia Graham (35:47.779)
Yeah. Get outside and nature. I looked at the moon last night with my little with my little one and we moved six weeks ago to Newport Beach. And from our top terrace, we see the sunset every single night. It is so beautiful. Like and yeah, and it just I I love it. I love it. And my my younger daughter's bedroom is also upstairs. So that's like so she loves looking at it. So so good. Leslie, where can people
Lesley Logan (36:03.062)
Ugh
Tia Graham (36:17.366)
Learn more about you, find you, and follow you.
Lesley Logan (36:21.123)
yeah. So you can you can learn more about me. I mean, I'm my Instagram is me. I run it. It's all me. It's what else on my mind and what's what's going on. So it's just Leslie.logan. But if you are wanting to start a movement practice, you want to get into something, I do actually have that might be applicable for you guys. It's just a free workshop series with a 15-minute workout. It's called fullbodyand15.com. And it is a workshop on how to do about 20 Pilates exercises, including answering people's questions about modifications.
And then at the end, it's a 15-minute workout, full body, does the whole thing. You can add it before a weight training session you do, after a run, you do, you can do whatever you want. So the goal is that you actually teach yourself. and if you're like, no, I really want to be guided, I ha I my YouTube channel is online online played classes. We have a ton of free stuff on there. And then if you want accountability.
a great community that onlinepliusclasses.com is where you want to go. We actually are the only online platform that I know of that actually has accountability and habits building built in. We also give feedback on form. So if you're like, I don't know if I'm doing this right, my perfectionist, I see you. We have that built in. You can actually submit like this is how I'm doing the exercise, but I fill it in my neck. And I am the person who provides that feedback. So you can do that. And if you like the sound of this voice, be it till you see it as a podcast, we'll have Tia on and we have an amazing conversation. And it's just something that I did.
It's not about Pilates, it's just about like life. Like how what people always ask me, You have so much confidence and I'm like, I'm I'm literally on a roller coaster screaming inside, owing up and down. But great. So how how have I done this? So I bring on different guests who can talk about the different ways we can be it till we see it and be inspired. So yeah.
Tia Graham (37:59.905)
I love it. I love it. Well, thank you for coming on today and I hope to see you again soon.
Lesley Logan (38:05.815)
I hope so too.