Guilt as a Guide

How often do you feel mom-guilt? How often do you feel guilty about how much or how little you are working? Do you feel guilty that you are not working out as much as you would like and so on, and so on?

Guilt is an emotional state or cognitive experience characterized by feelings of remorse, self-reproach, or regret over having done something wrong or failed to do something right. It is often associated with moral or ethical standards.

I felt SO MUCH guilt for over a decade as a working mom constantly questioning if I was doing things wrong. Not knowing that my child had a disability for close to 8-years added to my feeling of failing as a parent.

As a high-achieving mom, it is a huge change to not have unlimited hours to work on your career and this is a major shift for many women.

If you feel guilt, it means that you truly care and you are passionate about motherhood and your work. You truly care.

You can transform your guilt to self-love and your regret to self-compassion.

1) Guilt is an emotion. It is not negative or “bad”, it is information. When it arises, pause and write about what you are thinking and feeling and/or talk to someone about it. It does not mean that you are doing anything wrong, it is a signal that you need to look within you and make decisions.

2) It is a choice to truly love all parts of yourself. You may need support from a therapist or coach to help you get there, but it is 100% possible.

3) All working moms do things wrong sometimes, mess up, and fail. We are human beings doing our best raising our kids in the crazy, beautiful world. You are NOT alone. Give yourself grace and compassion.

What else helps you decrease the guilt?

You are enough.
Your kids love you so much.
Everything is going to be ok.

Tia